This is probably going to be the best post you’ve ever read. Everyone, buckle your seatbelts and strap on your pants, because the unbelievable news I’m about to deliver into your ear canals will strike you with the force of a thousand semi trucks full of chicken bones, and leave you gasping in sheer and utter awe at the magnitude and significance of this realization, which I am about to bestow upon you. Are you ready? Ok. Here is the message: I farted.